Maybe Joe's not so bad after all, as far as frivolous lawsuits goes.

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TOPIC: Maybe Joe's not so bad after all, as far as frivolous lawsuits goes.

Paul

Fvck you, clown. Sue me.

Status: Offline

Posts: 1694

Date: Thu Dec 27 6:12 PM, 2007

Maybe Joe's not so bad after all, as far as frivolous lawsuits goes.	Permalink

Saw this while perusing Fark. Jonathan Lee Riches has sued everyone from Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt to Starbucks Coffee to Jeffrey Dahmer and Charles manson to the Jewish Mossad. Plaintiff Jonathan Lee Riches, "heir to the royal throne," seeks 41 cents for damages and the return of the Jonathan Lee Riches Chronicles from defendants Elvis Presley and Neverland Ranch. Plaintiff alleges that Elvis Presley is a Rock n Rollin war crime criminal and that Presley is in preparation and training to be Bin Laden's #2 deputy. (Plaintiff also included a photo of Elvis and Bin Laden in front of the Frontier as an exhibit). Plaintiff charges that Elvis plans to use his guitar in Vegas as a weapon of mass destruction. Plaintiff also alleges that Elvis took his sideburns, put a stick in his bicycle spoke and suffocated him with a Chips Ahoy bag. He also charges that Suge Knight hung him from an Econo Lodge balcony with Vanilla Ice. As for Neverland, plaintiff contends that it is a training ground for disgruntled postal workers and hosts nightly pagan dances. See, Joe? If you're gonna have them tossed out of court anyway, you might at least make them entertaining. Just be careful he doesn't sue you next. Apparently, it's only a matter of time. __________________

Art Gordon

Topless Robot

Status: Offline

Posts: 1134

Date: Thu Dec 27 6:21 PM, 2007

Maybe Joe's not so bad after all, as far as frivolous lawsuits goes.	Permalink

If I were Joe I'd sue the following: The U.S. Postal service. One time they didn't deliver my water bill for three months straight and the water company shut off water. I did nothing wrong, the postman screwed me. McDonalds. I ate 12 Big Macs a day for a year and gained 97 pounds. While there was lettuce on the sandwich, they never explained to me that I might gain weight from eating them to excess. The Scranton Times. The list of reasons is endless, but mostly because they're whores and prostitution is illegal in Pennsylvania. The Lackawanna County District Attorney's office. See above. The guy I shared a foxhole with in 'Nam. I still think that f*cker was hitting on me, so I'm filing a suit for mental anguish. The Dow Chemical Company. I don't know what it was, but at some point I'm sure they produced a chemical that fried my brain. __________________ Make Jack pack!

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