Rumor has it that Scranton's favorite (well, only) serial-Plaintiff, Joe Pilchesky, is starting to become concerned about the cost of his on-going lititation habit. As as service to him, I say we offer some fundraising suggestions.
1. Car Wash, complete with a tankini clad Fay 'Foam@the Mouth' Franus (Credit Lus with this one...).
2. Four Words: 'Les Spindler Kissing Booth' I'll bet Thursday would be the first in line...
3. Have Ray Lyman go to children's birthday parties to entertain guests. I can hear it now, "Mommy, what is a 'Konsil'?" "Why is Ray the Clown eating all of my birthday cake?"
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Free Speech does't require a multi-paragrah disclaimer Mr. Pilchesky.
Maybe we could schedule an all day event ... possibly a weekend event ... you know kind of like the Italian Festival ... it's kind of late for this 4th of July but that would have been very fitting as he is the fighter of our constitutional rights ... Ray can entertain the children ... Fay can conduct her tankini car wash and Les could have a kissing booth ... maybe they can have the event covered by WILK ... and it can bring in all of the people from all over.
I have no doubt that Thursday will buy up all of the tickets for the kissing booth ...
Maybe even Granma can come and entertain us with her stories of the Scranton of Yesteryear ... it could be quite the event.
We could hold this event up at Nay Aug Park ... but they just might be opposed to that idea ...
Who could we get for entertainment ... other than Ray that is ... maybe the song stylings of Stanky and the Coal Miners ... it could be a hoppin place!
Hopefully others will have ideas as to how we can raise some money for poor old Joe!
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I want everyone to stop and think about one thing ... Joe Pilchesky is not a lawyer ... he's just a guy playing a lawyer on the internet. Please don't trust your legal needs to this man.
I would have suggested a nice Irish band ... but I know how they feel about the ICN ... so that's out!
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I want everyone to stop and think about one thing ... Joe Pilchesky is not a lawyer ... he's just a guy playing a lawyer on the internet. Please don't trust your legal needs to this man.
We could get Nancy Krake to weave a tale about something or other to entertain the kiddies.
Gramna and Nobody can do standup and tell redneck jokes.
I think it would be best if Pilcheski's missus runs the carwash, as she is proficient at 'waxing the vette'.
Marie Shumaker can give hairdo tips.
... and just let me know when and where because I'll have to get to the bank for a fistful of singles (which will ultimately wind up tucked gently into the waistband of Les's jeans).
Let's see him do some of the best Houdini or David Blaine escapes. What's the worst thing that could happen? I say it's worth the risk. Imagine if his escape artist success rate equaled that of his stellar law career.
I want everyone to stop and think about one thing ... Joe Pilchesky is not a lawyer ... he's just a guy playing a lawyer on the internet. Please don't trust your legal needs to this man.
