When a speaker is down to his or her last minute a little light on the time keepers table should light up. When he or she has only 30 seconds left the light should begin flashing. This will give speakers a fair chance to wind down their thoughts
It's similar to what they use in presidential debates. Should cost about 12 bucks.
When time is up the mic should be shut off.
If they continue foaming at the mouth after the mic is shut off, one of those loud air horns should be sounded to drown out everything they say. Hire some retired guy to work the air horn, that way you can't blame Mrs. Gatelli. Everytime the out of order speaker starts back up fire off the horn. In addition to being quite effective it would be hysterical.
"...and I think that Mrs. Gatelli is a jerk"...10...9...8...7...6...5..
"...and all you hecky shecky ICNers should be ashamed of yourselves"..3...2...1 (mic is turned off)
"...and you can all rot in"...BBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!! "...I'm not"...BBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!
"...Turn that horn"... BBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!
I still think we can cut down on half the speakers even getting to the podium if one of the drug sniffing dogs is in attendance at the next meeting.
For as much as I would like to see Sam go boi-yoi-yoing through a trapdoor, I think the alligators might have a hard time digesting his gold-plated jammies.
We should employ a strategy they are all familiar with and accustomed to -- A BIG-ASS BOUNCER !
(sure, I edited for a typo ... sure I did)
-- Edited by His Girl Thursday at 08:33, 2007-06-04
He'd show up in his light blue tuxedo and ruffled shirt looking all spiffy, only to be seated with the rest of the dignitaries at the diaz. Almost like Seinfeld did with Mel Torme and Kramer.
Actually ... now this is just a rumor ... I have no proof to back it up ... but I was up at Chicks and those tea an muffin drinkers were there again ... and well they were talking about how the Friendly Sons of St. Patrick have already booked Curley Joe Pilchesky (Political Stooge) to be the keynote speaker next year.
Joanne is being Sought by the Society of Irish women ... they want her to speak ... but ... she is not returning their calls ...
Again I do not know how true it is ... but I heard it from the tea drinking muffin eaters at Chicks ... but they seem pretty reliable!
__________________
I want everyone to stop and think about one thing ... Joe Pilchesky is not a lawyer ... he's just a guy playing a lawyer on the internet. Please don't trust your legal needs to this man.
I heard Joanne said she would only speak if the following conditions are met.
1. Everyone who attends must bring all their personal and private documents with them so she can use her magic scanner to scan all the documents into her private date base ( this date base also includes copious amounts of photos of total strangers she has taken for God only knows what reason .). 2 Permission to exploit such information on her and her weird husband's rumor filled web site.
Disclaimer: Of course I only heard this when 20 random people ran up to me in the street to say "news from the shed " is full of **** so I can not be certain of it's accuracy. If it gets confirmed at the counter of any local dinner I will let you know.
-- Edited by IHavehadenoughofhaters at 15:51, 2007-06-10
But you can only believe it if the tea drinkers who eat muffins (Bran Muffins) tell you ... otherwise you know that the person will be full of $hit!
__________________
I want everyone to stop and think about one thing ... Joe Pilchesky is not a lawyer ... he's just a guy playing a lawyer on the internet. Please don't trust your legal needs to this man.
I had to laugh at the last council meeting (so what's new?)
Someone was making their point at the podium and from behind them, you can see the missus holding up the wall with her camera in hand, taking random pictures - OF WHAT?? The camera filming the speaker from the front? She certainly couldn't have been taking one only of the council members because she could have taken that from anywhere in chambers. Someone's backside as they stand at the podium? (I know I would have been taking photos of Les' fierce arse if it were ME, but I digress ...)
I think she just wanted to take a picture of the camera taking her picture of her taking a picture of the camera. I wonder when THAT pic will be posted on the website. Maybe she'll have it blown up and taped over the communal bed at chez pilcheski.
