Granma is diversifying into the print media. Can't wait for her weekly radio show to start. Maybe once the old man starts WDIK, she'll get a spot.
Anyway, from the Letters to the Editor:
Bright idea
Editor: Since the powers that be have passed a law requiring that drivers have to turn on the headlights when windshield wipers are in use, I’d like to ask them a question.
Who is going to buy me a new battery, or come to start my car, when I forget to shut them off and the battery dies?
I’m a senior citizen on a fixed income. I can’t afford an auto club membership or a fancy car that automatically turns the lights on and off.
My car is sitting in my driveway for days so far and I can’t find anyone to start it.
Thanks to the powers that be.
LORENE MERCIER
OLD FORGE
This is why senior citizens need to be given a drivers test at least every other year. What's next? "Who's going to fill my tank when I forget to turn off the ignition and my car idles all night and rund out of gas?" Lorene, if you can't hear the bell dinging when you leave your lights on, maybe the battery in your car isn't the battery that needs the immediate attention?
Maybe this granma needs a Marilyn Manson type voice to scream at her as she opens her door a reminder to "TURN OFF YOUR LIGHTS OLD WOMAN" !
Every vehicle should have the option to come with perks like that. Personally, I would like my next car to come equipped with a big-ass airhorn and one of those sun barriers readable by the person in front of me that says "HANG UP AND DRIVE". Coincidentally, one will offset the other.
And I'll have a "Have a Nice Day" bumpersticker on the rear bumper for good measure.
The new law that mandates headlight use while driving in the rain is just another part of the plot by the ICN to make you drain your car's battery, and then you will have to have your car towed to an ICN-controlled garage and have a new battery sold by an ICN-controlled business installed in your car, thereby increasing the riches for Louie DeNaples and Bob Mellow, which will in turn fund Chris Doherty's campaign to rule the world from his Green Ridge fortress.
Geez, haven't you guys been paying attention to the "one true news outlet" at DD?
I just heard Louie Denaples just got approved for a patent on a rain machine and he will get total control of the weather. And don't tell anyone, but I hear Chris gets a piece of the pie too.
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..across the hall..where common sense is not so common..
Paul wrote: Granma is diversifying into the print media. Can't wait for her weekly radio show to start. Maybe once the old man starts WDIK, she'll get a spot.
Anyway, from the Letters to the Editor:
Bright idea
Editor: Since the powers that be have passed a law requiring that drivers have to turn on the headlights when windshield wipers are in use, I’d like to ask them a question.
Who is going to buy me a new battery, or come to start my car, when I forget to shut them off and the battery dies?
I’m a senior citizen on a fixed income. I can’t afford an auto club membership or a fancy car that automatically turns the lights on and off.
My car is sitting in my driveway for days so far and I can’t find anyone to start it.
Thanks to the powers that be.
LORENE MERCIER
OLD FORGE
This is why senior citizens need to be given a drivers test at least every other year. What's next? "Who's going to fill my tank when I forget to turn off the ignition and my car idles all night and rund out of gas?" Lorene, if you can't hear the bell dinging when you leave your lights on, maybe the battery in your car isn't the battery that needs the immediate attention?
All I can say to this is Oh My GOD ... who tells her to turn off her headlights after night driving?
Maybe Governor Rendell can pass special legislation allowing the state to hire people in each town in PA ... you know the light police ... they can come around and tell everyone when they have left the lights on in their vehicles ... but in order to do this they may have to raise taxes ... it's just a thought ... we do need the jobs here ...
Oh and I think this must be Granmas twin sister! And I am thanking God that she does not live in Scranton ... but I would put money on the fact that she more than likely is a poster at DD.
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I want everyone to stop and think about one thing ... Joe Pilchesky is not a lawyer ... he's just a guy playing a lawyer on the internet. Please don't trust your legal needs to this man.
By the way ... I can always count on you guys for a laugh ... thank you!
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I want everyone to stop and think about one thing ... Joe Pilchesky is not a lawyer ... he's just a guy playing a lawyer on the internet. Please don't trust your legal needs to this man.
This isn't funny anymore. Now the ICN is teaming up with big oil and the auto industry to force more car sales of gas guzzling SUV's so people like granny can own cars that will turn the lighst off by themselves.